That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
