Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize