Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
