this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
