I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
