Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Randomize
