so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
