didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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