i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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