I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
