I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
