How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
