I heard we made out
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
