the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
