I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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