I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
