The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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