i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
