very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize