1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize