I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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