North Korea, Best Korea!
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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