I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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