this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
