Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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