i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
