do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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