Kiss
Puke
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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