Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
