Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize
