My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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