it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
My pussy is not your playground.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
i've created a new STD.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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