its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
