...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
