you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
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