its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
