I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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