I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
