There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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