idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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