im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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