butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
