You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize