i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
