D3 body, D1 cock
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
