who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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