It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
