He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
