Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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