do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Randomize
