i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize